Tuesday, March 20, 2012

And They Call Us Anti-Woman?

From the lovely Jess at NFP Works.

My school hosts an Ethics Roundtable every month or so about hot topic issues. It's a great forum for civil exchange with others about differing opinions. Last month the topic was abortion. It actually compounded quite well with the changes in the Komen Grant funding (or the lack of changes...who knows?) I went to be a voice for the pro-life side and act as the token Catholic

I wanted to share a really interesting pro-choice argument that I heard with you all:

"In order for men and women to be true equals we must ensure abortion is readily accessible."

I wasn't able to respond because this was one of the last comments made by the moderator of the event. It's probably better that way because my response would have been "Are you motherf*cking kidding me??? Is this a joke?"

Now that I've had the opportunity to think about this a little more thoroughly here is my counter argument. Are you motherf*cking kidding me? I mean, I find this horribly offensive, degrading, repugnant and some more words that mean bad. Yeah, really bad. Instead of insisting that women and men are created innately equal they are saying "Women are not equal to men and will only be equal to men if they disable their perfectly normal and functioning reproductive system." Instead of asking men to take responsibility for their actions with the women they "love" they shift the total responsibility of fertility to the woman to 'take care of it' all for the sake of liberation and women's rights. Well I'm calling BS.

This infuriates me. I happen to think that women and men are equals just the way God (or evolution, whichever you prefer) made them. Are we functionally equal? No. Women and men have different parts and those different parts have different functions. Women were made to carry a child. We were made to nurture our children. This is all biologically ensured to propagate the species. Our pelvic bones are wider for the sake of giving birth. We develop breasts for the sake of feeding an infant. We have a menstrual cycle for sake being able to care for and nurture that child from the very second of their creation. Men have a penis for the sake of impregnating a women.

Now I know I'm biased but having the ability to carry, deliver, and nurture a child seems pretty kick ass to me in comparison to the alternative. These abilities do not make us inferior. Nor do they make us superior in dignity (but in pure capibilities, I'd have a different argument.)

Feminists who push this 'not equal until' mentality need to think about what they're saying. We need to quit letting a contraceptive mentality tell us that we aren't good enough just the way we are. We should absolutely be treated with the same respect and dignity that men are but we should not sacrifice our innate femininity for the sake of being more like men. That in my opinion is truly anti-woman.


  1. YES! I am not the same as a man (nor would I ever want to be), but I am equal in dignity! My fertility is one of my most valued treasures, and even if that did make me "unequal" with men, I wouldn't want to get rid of it!

  2. Bravo! I agree! I often wonder...why is it people who push abortion and contraception think they are helping women at all? They are only helping women...NOT be women. Trying to make women into men, effectively, does not help women's cause!

  3. I can't agree with you more. As women, we need to squash the lie that our bodies are somehow inferior to a man's... First of all, this only strengthens the notion that the penis somehow retains some kind of superiority, and men therefore are "better". This kind of thinking wouldn't even be espoused by radical feminists, so why is it being pushed on women in 2012? Secondly, pregnancy and the ability to bear life is NOT a disease. it is a sign that a woman's body is fully healthy and functioning. Let me be honest, from the heart of a woman unable to bear children to term, it is horrifying to me that the trauma of infertility is being touted as a preferred norm!

  4. I think that their argument centers on the idea that sex should have no consequences. That life is only 'fair' and we can only be 'equal' when we are equally able to have repercussion-free sex.

    Here's the problem: abortion doesn't balance the scales, because women have to walk around with the pain of that choice. No, the way to balance the scales is to shift our culture so that it's unacceptable to walk away from a consequence you're 50% responsible for. Sex should never be consequence-free for ANYONE.

    My counter argument would be: "In order for men and women to be true equals we must ensure that we are raising men who understand the responsibilities that come with sex, and who comprehend their role in fathering a potential child."

  5. Yes, the "feminist movement" has told us that the only way that we can be equal to men is to sterilize ourselves to become more like them (able to have consequence free sex). Women have chosen sterilization and barrenness in exchange for a chance at competing with men for jobs, income, and social status.

    To attempt to show that woman and men are equal by their very humanity, by their very nature, we would have to attempt to change the way women AND MEN view women. Not simply as another cog in the wheel of life, or another object for pleasure, but as something sacred by their ability to bring forth new life. This would involve educating men and women about fertility and childbirth, both of which are feared by a large majority of our culture, sterilized and hidden.

    And here is the real kicker. I would argue that men have been using women's fertility to oppress them for centuries. Every once in a while you have a culture that pops up that honors women for their fertility and raises them to a high position in the society, but not traditionally. Traditionally women are the "weaker sex", the vulnerable ones who must bear the "shame" of being in a "family way." Pregnancy and birth were disgusting, unpleasant states a woman must go through. Men/society were able to oppress women because they viewed and treated women this way.

    Rather than revolting against this perverse way of looking at women's fertility and gifts and demanding that men recognize the profound nature of a woman's ability to give birth and cherish her for it we have instead completely capitulated with the old "if you can't beat 'em, join 'em." It's a twisted world.

    P.S. I was watching a PBS interview with some "women of industry" and one of the questions asked was "what is one of the most important things necessary for women to continue to excel in the business world and achieve financial and professional equality with men?"

    The answer: Reproductive Rights.

  6. Totally agree. It's sad that it even needs to be said, so far have we distanced ourselves from the reproductive reality of sex and the marriage bond. Instead of raising up men and women who respect and value the profound mystery of sex, who understand the inherent beauty of gender difference, and who worship a Creator generous enough to include us in the process of shaping life (an enormous privilege!), we raise up men and women who worship only their idea of freedom. "Freedom" from sexual bonds, "freedom" from reproduction, "freedom" even from gender.

    I'm consistently blown away by the fact that my views are considered "fringe" by most of my 20-something friends, even many Catholics! Like, me getting married young AND attending Mass regularly AND being open to life (i.e. actively utilizing NFP instead of poisoning myself with artificial hormones) makes me a total freak show. God help us all. Seriously.

  7. I think your first counterargument was the most effective ;)

    The fact is that if feminists pushed for women to be respected as we actually are, they would have to argue that staying at home with children is valuable. That embracing any part of us is good - whether that's our awesome career skills or mothering skills or both!

    But they can't, because for so long they've made children the enemy of all modern women: birth could kill you, maternity leave takes away your advantages at work, kids cost money, wreck your marriage, body, sex life - have one if you must, but egads, not too many!

    Admitting fertility as a good would be disastrous for their fear-mongering party line.

  8. Too bad we aren't seahorses and the men give birth. Maybe then they would know what it's like. I'm not sure I understand how having abortions available helps men. There are TONS of women who just have the abortion without telling the men and there are TONS of men that tell the women to have the abortion but then they don't do it.

    Like Kate said people want a reason not to have consequences for doing something bad.

  9. AMEN!!! (If I could type it bigger, I would!)

  10. Husband (he's a man) says: the greatest trick of the sexual revolution was that MEN somehow conned women into believing that they were trying to fight for their equal rights, when, in reality they were just trying to get laid.

  11. What about prenatal care, birthing options, and maternity leave being affordable and readily accessible? Are you m%^&%ing kidding me indeed.

  12. Oh, those feminists. All 3 that I know are currently sitting at home leeching off their significant others while shouting about how they don't need a man. Right...

    Can I just take a moment to say that I love to see you curse? It makes me feel better about my own dirty mouth. :)

    1. Well, this feminist is working hard to help support her family, so there's that.

  13. I would have been so frustrated at that event! Great counterargument. I don't think I will ever understand the logic (if you can call it that) behind pro-choice arguments.

  14. and the 17 yr old boy. says..oh, you're taking a pill so you won't get pregnant? sounds good to me.

  15. Yes! Yes! Yes! You are sooo right! I think it all goes back to this culture's twisted understanding of masculinity and femininity. I fail to see how negating all biological difference makes us equal; how horrible and alien of a world would it be if we were all the same in every way? We would be like asexual alien animals or something...oh, wait... All you have to do is watch an episode of the Jersey Shore to see the pure misery of this degradation and squalid philosophy.

    PS... I loved your original reaction to that person's statement! ;)

  16. I think your initial response is probably the most appropriate! Love the post, and I pray for the day that people realize that our differentness is beautiful, not something that we should have to somehow disable.

  17. I love your passion. And your reason, too. The radical feminist movement is built on lies that have terrible consequences for women. How much love were these women denied in childhood that they ended up this way?

  18. I'm not sure where to begin.

    As a man, I am called to love my wife as Christ loves his Church. I am called to cherish and comfort her as my own body. I am not called to objectify her, knock her up, and then throw away the baby.

    Abortion allows men to escape their responsibilities. Abortion is one example. Others are fathers that simply leave.

    It causes untold issues for children and mothers whose fathers and husbands leave.

    The fact that someone claims this is akin to equality is sadly mistaken and confused.

  19. Great post! The pro-choice argument is an example of how people insist that in order to be "equal," we must be the "same," otherwise it's not "fair." Being equal in dignity does not mean that we must be the same. Sameness is not a criterion for equality, nor is it a criterion for fairness. What they are getting wrong is that if equal dignity is a given (which it is, of course) then whether we are the same or not clearly does not affect the level of that dignity.

    I think the reason for the equal dignity part not being seen is a lack of belief in God in mainstream culture. Our dignity as persons is directly derived from having been created in God's image. Secular society is generally atheistic (in practice, if not completely in belief). Atheism denies the intrinsic dignity of the person because it denies God. If there is no Divine to have created us in his image, then we have no inherent dignity. This is why radical feminism, a result of secular culture, wants to value our bodies only based on what we can do with them (extrinsic value), instead of recognizing the value of what we are our bodies inherently are (intrinsic value).

    -E at http://thesparkandtheflame.blogspot.com/

  20. I can't find it now- but I saw the cutest clip art with a pg woman- words saying "so crafty I make people" lol

    I have a guest post today that might interest you- heavy on the theology http://remnantofremnant.blogspot.com/2012/03/artificial-contraception-why-not-nfp.html

  21. I don't think the panelist's statement was meant to be prescriptive in any way. Saying that something SHOULD be accessible isn't the same thing as saying that every woman MUST avail herself of it.

    Impeding one gender's access to medical care intended to treat their sex-specific anatomy creates a situation of inequality. Think about this: what if men couldn't access care specifically for their penises or prostates? That would be pretty dang unfair. Of course, this all rests on the assumption that abortion and contraception are a given part of the reproductive healthcare spectrum. I'm not really interested in having that discussion, though :)


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